Completed my mid-terms yesterday, with the math paper ending at 9.52pm lol that's the latest paper I have ever taken. It was only 1 hr with 10 mcqs but not enough time at all!!! It was a crazaaay paper. Programming paper was terrible, and by terrible I mean scoring 7/20. Initially I thought I only scored 1/20 lol because the last 5 questions (all mcqs)were linked, so I thought that if you didn't get all of them right, you don't get any marks. But I guess they were being nice by giving us the marks. It was 2m each okay! Otherwise I would have gotten 1/20. 5%. Omg. I'm seriously dying for programming. All the pre-defined functions, looping, vectors and what not. When I saw an entire page of weird words my brain really just turned off. I really had no idea what the codings were meant to do. I really need to start working harder for the remaining semester to at least pass this module and s/u it, or else I would have to retake it next semester T.T

But it's okay, I'm just gonna take this as a reminder for me to buck up. Whether you are at ulu ntu, central smu or smelly army (oops lol), jiayou guys~

I'm feeling the stress again. The inferiority complex is coming back..
I went for consultation with the OUTSTANDING chem engineers (lol that's the WA group chat name) today and they all seemed to be able to do the papers fairly easily and had questions to ask the prof. I really dk what I was doing there cuz I didn't have anything to ask. Or rather, I didn't know what to ask. That's the thing, if you really know what you're doing, you should have questions to ask otherwise you don't really understand. So I was just there trying to catch up with their discussion but failed to.
They all seemed like smart people who can solve the questions in half the time I took to solve it. I was never a smart student. I was at most a hardworking student, at worst a mugger. Since JH times, I was never in the 'smart classes'. Okay I know I shouldn't think this way, that's why I say it's an inferiority complex. It really sucks to feel like you're the only one feeling screwed.
Even for math, I'm struggling just attempting the previous mid-term papers. Like seriously, math is supposed to be the one that is comparatively more manageable. Sem 1 is supposed to be the most manageable sem out of the 4 years. So now what?!
It's come to the extent where I'm actually regretting choosing this course. I should have chosen Chemistry instead even though it may be less practical in a way.

Anyway, just in case some of you are wondering what even made me choose this course then, I'm actually interested in the production of consumer products like soap, cosmetics etc. And chemical engineering =/= engineering haha

I just went kampong style and starting doing work on the floor haha. But I still gave up cuz I decided my brain isn't functioning well at this hour and it is a little uncomfortable and hard XD fyi I like lying on the floor!

Anyway I can't believe I was blowing bubbles during my bath just now LOL. It was damn random like 'oh it's been a long time I blew bubbles' and I started blowing. Now I can blow much bigger bubbles and getting them to float in the air without bursting >)

Jiayou to those mugging for their mid-terms!

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Thanks girl ;)

I went for muay thai today at another gym. It was because the instructor who I knew through the previous gym asked me to go there and try. He added me on fb and kept asking me to go to his gym. Honestly I didn't really like the idea, I would rather have stayed at the same gym but I didn't know how to reject him. So I decided to just go, otherwise he would keep messaging me, asking me to go. He said that usually the school would be closed on Sundays, but if I wanted he could train me for free. So being the cheapo that I was, I agreed.

I really felt very hesitant and doubtful. But I thought that he was probably just being nice so I decided to not think too much about it and just go. He even offered to meet me at the mrt station to bring me to the gym (that's why yik saw me). I felt awkward with him, especially when he held my hand to cross the road and didn't let go. So I pretended I needed to check my phone. I eventually figured that this was probably just their culture, but I'm still not used to these kinda things. I think he probably could sense that I was uncomfortable so he just held onto my finger(s) in the end LOL.

When we reached the gym, it turns out that we were the only people there, which made me hesitate again. But no, the fact that I can be here typing this out means that he was just a honest chap who was probably trying to poach me to go to his gym haha. After training he suggested going to Golden Mile Complex, which I declined at first because I still felt weird, but we walked there after all. He then bought me two bowls of dessert (that's why I said he wanted to poach me over lol) even though I told him that I needed to go back in 15 minutes.

So I feel quite bad for doubting him. IDK, I have always been rather cautious towards strangers, be it when I'm overseas or even in Sg. If only I were a guy I wouldn't have to think about so much. And while we were walking to get the food I asked him if he had any thai friends in Sg, and he said no, other than those he met from the gym. I shouldn't have asked him that damn. Okay I know, this post is rather incoherent but just wanted to get this off my chest.

Beautiful.... Especially the piano parts omg.
If you have never heard of the song before you would probably not know that this is a cover.

New driver here~

I was really lucky today for getting a nice tester and having (surprisingly) few cars on the road. With luck on my side, I am now a legal driver!!! ^^

It feels so surreal though. I spent the last few months (since mid-May) learning how to drive, going all the way to Ubi and back home for lessons and now I no longer have to go back there again. It could also be because I don't have a fixed instructor, meaning to say I was allocated a different instructor for most of the 26 lessons I attended, so there was no proper farewell to anybody except to the driving school I suppose. Haha I had my first (and most likely my last) meal there after my test.

Even the whole test felt so unreal, it was almost like a normal lesson. It was a good thing I guess, otherwise I may have screwed up because of the nerves. So yup thanks to my tester who was being friendly right from the start. But I did make some mistakes that I usually didn't make, like parking too much to the right and having to correct it (I really just luan lai one lol I didn't know which side to turn to XD).

Oh and there was a part where I had to lane change all the way from the left-most lane to the right-most lane (4 lanes in total) in order to make a U-turn. But I was lucky that there weren't any cars behind me HAHA. Even the tester said "Funny, where did all the cars go?" and I laughed and told him that they were all giving way to me :P Yep luck was on my side today. Still, I got penalised for changing lanes abruptly oops.

Anyway, I'm really dreading the rest of this week. Because of the test, I had to miss a few classes and have to attend make-up lessons for them tomorrow. I have Soci assignment and lab report due on Friday, CN tutorial by Thursday (omg I spent super long on one question and there's 5 more!!) and I have to help out with chess stuff these few days. What's worse is that apparently this week's lab report is tougher than usual, when I have been spending a lot of time on the past 3 reports >< Idk if it's because of today's test (maybe I was stressed subconsciously) or the sun that was shining on me during my bus rides, but I'm having a headache right now. I was contemplating whether or not to stay up and get started on my Soci assignment, but nah I shall go sleep the headache away. Doubt I'll be able to be productive and not feel irritated if I were to bear with the pain. At most I'll wake up earlier tomorrow.

Okay, who am I kidding. I'll still wake up at 7.30am the earliest ^^;

When someone's actions doesn't deserve any respect, you don't have to show him respect. It doesn't matter how much younger you are than him. The respect you show to a person should not be measured by his age or seniority. It's so ironic how people view him as their role model, claiming that he's so "humble" and what shit. I literally scoffed when I first read that. He's by-far the least humble person I know and he's superficial. You will never know how much he cares for his grandmother (i.e. almost inexistent) who took care of him when he was young. For someone like him to have so many worshippers, I must say that the world must be filled with crazy and ignorant people.

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On a separate note, I feel like oversleeping for tomorrow's meeting hahaha. Shall leave it to my body to decide~